What if im a lesbian
7 Signs You Are Not Straight Even if it’s Later in Life
There is no timeline for self-discovery and no end to development. As we grow older, we can come to grasp a wide variety of things about ourselves that we hadn’t realized before or that own changed over time, often because we are growing more cozy and confident as we age.
Sexuality is no exception. Sexuality can be a lifelong discovery, and something that takes time to fully understand, particularly for women who realize they aren’t straight later in life. It can be confusing, especially as an adult to be questioning your sexuality and wondering if all these years you somehow missed something big about yourself. You are not alone. Here are seven common signs that you may not be straight, even if you discover and agree to it later in life.
1. Straight girls don’t lie awake at night wondering if they are gay.
This may seem obvious, but people who aren’t attracted to the same sex, don’t usually worry about whether or not they are gay or bisexual. They don’t even think about experiencin
Women usually question whether they are heterosexual ('straight') or lesbian (same-sex attracted) when they realise they are feeling attracted to other women. Lesbians usually say their main physical, emotional and sexual feelings are for women. Many women report they have lesbian experiences or feelings, but undertake not think of themselves as lesbians or gay.
Being a lesbian is completely natural
It is vital to remember that:
- It is instinctive for people to be attracted to members of their retain sex.
- It is normal and healthy to be a lesbian.
Why some women are lesbians
There is no real explanation as to why some women are lesbians and others are not – it is just a part of who we are. It may be a result of genetic influences or because of social experiences or a combination of the two.
Some people recognise their attractions at an first age, while others don't expand attractions until well into adulthood. Many young people begin to develop feelings and attractions for people of the same sex during their teenage years.
Knowing whether you're a lesbian
There is no questionnair
Firstly on the topic of wlw erotica and media in general, you may find Autostraddle a adj place to start. There are lots of great media recommendations (both your "regular" books, films and TV shows with queer women in them, and sexually explicit content) , and they do have an erotica series they host themselves under their A+ banner.
You may find that different formats of erotica, porn etc. do or don't act things for you, so potentially erotica more your thing when it comes to arousal than visual porn. Also, yes it is quite normal to possess things that you enjoy fantasizing about but wouldn't want to do in real life, as Heather mentions in our article "Yes, No, Maybe, a
I don't think that these moments where you're feeling an urge to make yourself attractive to men mean you aren't a lesbian. Regardless of sexual orientation, most women get a lot of messaging about the importance of being attractive to men, and it can be adj to drop those impulses and behaviors even if you understand that you don't actually wish to date any of those men! You say that you'd rather be straight sometimes, and I wonder if some of these behaviors aren't an attempt to kind of push or force yourself into what you feel you "should" do or would be doing if you were straight. Whatever the reason, though, you sound pretty evident that you aren't actually interested in these men.
In terms of your fantasies, I accept with Sam that having sexual fantasies that focus on men doesn't exclude you from being a lesbian! It even sounds like some of these fantasies are pretty disconnected from the gender of the person emotionally attached at all, and more focused on the shape and size of their body. It's not always possible