Gay bi relationship
How to Support Your Bi Partner
This guide is for you, non-bi people in a relationship with someone who is bi. It may be that you are a straight person with a bi person, and so are seen by society as being a "straight couple," though you are not because one person in the relationship is bi, and therefore the couple is not "straight." Or it may be that you are a gay man or lesbian gal in a relationship with a bi person of the alike sex, and so society views you as a "gay couple" or "lesbian couple," which, again, you are not .
There is also the question of whether one or both of you are monogamous or polyamorous. Though there is a misconception on the part of non-bi people that bi people are all polyamorous , that is not the case. Some bi people are polyamorous; some bi people are monogamous. Some straight people are polyamorous; some straight people are monogamous. Some lesbian and gay people are polyamorous; some lesbian and gay people are monogamous. Some people across all sexualities are celibate. (Yes, bi people can be celibate and still b
Gay Men in Open Relationships: What Works?
Hint: It will take a lot of work.
As a couples counselor working with gay men I am often asked my opinion on monogamy and unclosed LGBTQ relationships. What works for men in long-term relationships? First, the research.
Several research studies illustrate that about 50% of gay male couples are monogamous and about 50% allow for sex outside of the relationship. The research finds no difference in the level of happiness or stability among these groups.
Next, my opinions and advice, based on my therapy practice.
Talk About It Openly With Your Partner
If you and your partner want to have a close relationship and have additional sex partners, be prepared for a lot of talking. And I&#;m not just referring to discussions about when, where and with whom. I mean talking about feelings, what we therapists call &#;processing.&#;
If that kind of conversation makes you squirm, I understand. Most men are not socialized to embrace the sharing of intimate and vulnerable emotions. However, if you aren&#;t willing to experiment with processing then I suspect
What Gay Men Should Expect in a Relationship
Some gay men lay up with a lot in their relationships. Their long-term partners will aggressively flirt with other men in front of them, go home with a guy from the bar without any forewarning, sleep with ex-lovers without gaining consent from their current lover, or brag to their current boyfriends about the quality of their sex with strangers. Ouch.
Here&#;s what I find most concerning. Some gay men don&#;t feel they have a right to be upset about these behaviors. They&#;ll ask me why they feel so jealous and how can I help them let go of their jealousy. They think that the gay community believes in sexual noun and it isn&#;t cool or manly to object to their partner&#;s sexual behavior.
In other words, they feel shame for experiencing hurt by the actions of their long-term partners.
Heterosexual couples obtain plenty of social support for treating their partners with respect when it comes to sex. Outrage is the typical social response when friends are told about poor relationship behavior among straight people. When gay men tell
OK, so, you’re gay, and you want to find a partner and eventually a husband; someone with whom to share your life. However, you just can’t seem to meet the right guy or make the right connection. You keep coming up empty-handed, stymied in your efforts, no matter what you experiment. All of this talk of legalized marriage just seems to make things worse, adding pressure from friends, family, and even yourself.
You think that maybe it’s just not possible for gay men to have long-term relationships. There must be some reality to the old joke: “What does a gay man transport on a second date?” Response: “What second date?” You would be ready to throw in the towel, if it weren’t for your best friend who met someone and is now in a happy relationship for the past two years—or that middle-aged couple who live in your building and who just celebrated 25 years together with a trip to Paris. So you end up wondering, “What’s the matter with me? What am I doing wrong?”
As an openly gay man with over 30 years of experience as a therapist, I have seen scores of single gay men sabotage their efforts to fin